Start talking about logic gates and flip flops and PLAs and FPGA, maybe even throw in few of the ASICs. If they don’t shut up even after that then bring in the big guns and start talking about doping and PN junctions and How BJTs are better than FETs
What they say: “You know about computers, right?”
What they mean: “Can you fix this bug in Microsoft’s software?”I was legally contracted to say yes.
At least it was satisfying to answer NO when the question involved their personal (not a company one) acer cheap mall laptop filled with mcafee, bloatware and socuh combined with the slowest low capacity hdd in existence.
Hell NO
Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes
Edsger W. Dijkstra
And when your radio is broken, you don’t ask a composer
Pro tip: whenever a relative asks you to fix their computer, wipe everything and set up Linux for them. That’ll teach em.
“You use Arch, now, btw”
“Make sure to write that down, because you’re legally required to bring it up at every possible opportunity.”
I just tell them that I only deal with Linux and that is usually enough to dissuade.
,oh how glad, my ubuntu is broken since update"
Honestly no problem, if they’re tech literate enough to have gotten that far it’ll probably be okay
Then it’s fun lol
Exactly.
Looks like we’re setting up an improvised KVM device! :D
Legit haven’t touched windows in 5 years, I don’t know my way around it
I haven’t used Windows personally in about 15 years and professionally in about 10. I’m pretty useless on anything newer than XP. I even got my wife to switch over to a Mac Mini because at least that has a Unix-like OS and she can still do her audio work on it (in fact, better than a Windows system because their patch QA is light-years ahead of the MS “fuck it, it’ll break some systems but we’ll get that next patch Tuesday” approach).
That’s not to say that I like Apple. I just dislike their OS less than Windows.
You have experienced the pinnacle of Windows (we could probably also add Windows 7 to this). Do yourself a favor and never touch a Windows 10 and especially Windows 11 machine. It’s unimaginable how Microsoft managed to break everything that was working and how clever they are in terms of marketing to sell you stuff you don’t need.
They made me finally switch to Linux because my paid 365 subscription offered me to try the new outlook because Windows Mail was to be discontinued in future. I activated the test and the fun began: Only one of seven accounts was imported into outlook. Of course it was the only Microsoft account (Outlook). All other Accounts were ignored. I thought „Ok migration didn’t work, I’ll do it later manually“ I had a new email. I clicked on it. Edge opened although Firefox was my standard browser. It took me a couple of seconds to realize that I was clickbaited into opening an advertisement by one of the biggest companies on this planet.
This made me immediately stop my work and install Linux Mint. I’m not going back any time soon.
For job related reasons I have to use a lot of VMs. Unfortunately most of them are Windows 10. I created a naked installation years ago and basically use this as the base for individual development VMs. One of these annoyed me for days to make an update. All I could click was „remind me in one hour“ or update immediately. So I chose the one hour a lot of times. I finally let it update. Now my (Windows default!) task bar is transparent and also the whole windows menu. A colleague using the same VM with the latest updates (without changes to installed software) has no issues.
Did that for my sister but nowadays I just use the excuse: “Sorry I can’t help you, I don’t use Windows anymore”.
The real problem is when a relative know that I’m computer guy and ask me to fix the TV/air conditioner or like my father once did: setup an antenna
Did that, kind of. The system’s been running flawlessly for like a decade now. I’m not sure if they even understand the difference.
Or even better, install Emacs and run away laughing wildly! Bwahahahaha!
Computer science has absolutely nothing to do with support, they are totally different fields with totally different skill sets.
Most programmers I’ve known would be garbage at support and most support staff might be able to do some scripting but sure as hell aren’t coders.
Computer science has absolutely nothing to do with support, they are totally different fields with totally different skill sets.
That also holds for computer science and programming :)
Okay but someone that works in IT will have the same answer.
Nobody should work for free unless we get to live in a post scarcity society
My answer is usually “I don’t use computers the same way you do, so I probably won’t know what you’re talking about.”
People need to understand the difference between computer science, information technology, software engineering and Tech Support
and “actually needing Microsoft support but coming to you cause Microsoft doesn’t give a shit about private end users”
ELI5 ??
Computer sciences is mathematics, software engineering is programming, IT support (I’m including infrastructure and infosec here) is making sure that computers run fine for the employees needs.
Don’t let the infosec people hear that you lump them into support. At one of my past organizations they outright refused their workshops to be integrated with the company wide ticketing system. He can use it but not infosec.
Generally, but I am likely missing some stuff:
Computer Science: The underlying theory around making efficient computer software (I would consider the hardware side computer engineering)
Information Technology: the process of managing computer software and hardware systems for an organization
Software Engineering: the process of developing software including writing code, prioritizing features / bug fixes
Tech Support: part of IT. Troubleshooting and resolving issues with an organizations hardware and software systems
Tis is the same
My new excuse is, “I only know linux, I don’t know anything about windows.”
I do that too but only because it’s much easier to help my relatives with Linux than those with Windows.
I even “convert” some people because Llinux is easier for them if I just manage it. I had a neighbor that was using Window on a very old computer, it was slow and choking under the weight of simple updates. Plus, she was always asking me why her computer kept rebooting by itself while it was obviously Windows update. So I installed Mint and all the problems went away.
Anyway I don’t want to have to deal with Microsoft accounts, licenses, office365, the general bloat, the ads, the new versions of Windows… I have enough at work, so if I am going to help on my free time, it has to be on the OS I find easier to deal with.
Stare at their computer blankly
“Wait, they got rid of the green hill???”But that’s where I kept my emails. How do I get back to that hill?
“… don’t you have a cloud or something for going back to the hill ??”
(Actually, ever since NES, he had vaguely pictured computers as being related to the pipes in that Mario Brothers game)
“Right, so you see, when a conductor is passed through a magnetic field, an electromotive force is produced, and this force can perform work, which can in turn be used to represent probabilistic information…”
mashes the A button to skip dialog
HAHAAA YOU FOOL YOU HAVE ACTIVATED MY INFODUMP I AM AN UNSKIPPABLE CUTSCENE
understanding how a cpu works and how to write efficient programs is the easy part.
understanding why windows does [anything] is the hard part.
Yeah, just read that their newest server OS puts a recovery partition to the right of the primary partition by default.
Which is completely useless on a server, and prevents you from growing the partition when you run out of space.At this point, they’re basically saying “Office and AD guarantee our monopoly, so we can push out literal monkey shit, and tell admins to deal with it.”
no uncle steve, that’s commuter science, I know ALL ABOUT PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION
Relative: You know about computers, right?
Me: I’m not sure. Who knows about computers, really? In the words of W.S. McCulloch, “What is a number, that a man may know it, and a man, that he may know a number?” (if you’ll pardon the gendered language) Now if you extend this to computation…
Relative: All right, STFU, I just wanted to know how to update my Amazon account…
What is a number, that a man may know it?
Lets start with natural numbers and define the integers, rational, real and complex numbers as solutions to certain equations.
and a man, that he may know a number?
Now you asked for to much.
Especially this time of year when people are panicking for whatever reason, people are travelling, people are coming and going, people are buying laptops, devices and phones and the majority of them don’t know how digital files or folders even work (or where they are in a digital system).
If you know anything about computers … just pretend you don’t know anything like everyone else. It will save you so much work and headaches this time of year.
And don’t get soft either … cute girl asking for help? NO … old grandma has a new laptop? NO … your dying relative has a new phone? NO! … your two year old niece has a new tablet? NO! … your drug dealer wants to lower your debt in exchange for fixing their PC? HELL NO!!!
your drug dealer wants to lower your debt in exchange for fixing their PC? HELL NO!!!
nuh uh, if i’m getting paid (getting paid in reduced debt is still paid cuz it’s money i was gonna give him anyway) i’ll do whatever
Yep that’s a contract and I work for those
No, sorry, I don’t know what kind of ass-backwards somersault your windows machine did this time. Your word doc is randomly missing every third paragraph? Too right mate.
